Relationship Decision?
Hi Everyone, I am from Canada and my girlfriend is from Florida. We got together for one year when I went to school in Florida. When I finished my studies I was unable to obtain a work visa and had to move back to Canada. Due to the economy I was unable to get a steady teaching position in education (I'm a teacher) I moved to South Korea. The plan was to be in South Korea for a year and then go through the process of obtaining a fiancee visa. I just got a good job offer that would keep me here in South Korea an extra six months. It's a good opportunity and the money I would make would pay off all of my student debt. The problem is that my girlfriend is having a hard time with the separation and doesn't think she could handle any more time apart. Which I understand, as long distance is difficult. We had a plan for her to come here for a few months but now she is unsure and doesn't want me to be gone any longer. She doesn't want to get attached and then have to go through another 9-12 months of this. She supports me with my career but feels as though I'm putting myself ahead of us as a couple. She told me that if that's what I wanted to do that was fine but that she needs us to have a solid plan or she needs to move on. I view it like I have to get my career started because while my girlfriend is still in school I will be the one who is supporting us and I can't do that with debt and in a job market that is non-existent in my field. I'm putting pressure on myself to do what is necessary for us to be able to be financially independent and have a stable career for myself. She offered to come and teach with me in Taiwan next year, where we could both make good money, as a way to solve the problem of being apart. But I worry that she is doing that more so to be with me and not because it is a goal of hers. I worry that could lead to problems and she isn't aware of that. So basically we have decided to decide on what we are going to do. We'll either have a plan or we'll go our separate ways. I love her very much but I feel as though I won't be able to provide for us unless I am able to build up my work experience and have a steady income. Am I being selfish, placing myself before us as a couple? Or am I being realistic and trying to make sure that we are able to have the stability to make sure our plans are able to come to fruition? Advice? Thanks :)
Singles & Dating - 3 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
yer she'll leave unless she is in madley in love with you
2 :
i think that it is a little of both..but i can see that you are doing it for you and your future with your fiancee...and if it is meant to be then ya will find a way to make it work...i can understand where she is coming from..(at the time he was my boyfriend)my fiancee was over seas in Iraq and it was really hard for me and him...but i just let god in and he got me through it...dont give up!!!
3 :
I don't believe you're being selfish but rather looking at the bigger picture for the both of you..of course the separation will be hard and you will have to endure it for months..but during that time you will be gaining the stability to make your relationship last in the long run.. love takes sacrifice and if the both of you really love each other there is a way to get through it..and she will be willing to deal with the separation
